April 6th, 2023

I was supposed to go to Ireland but I didn't go. It's still on the radar but I went South (Spain), first for a holiday but 2 weeks transformed into 3, then 4... and to be honest I want to keep on exploring while taking my time. [edit: it's August 2023 & I'm still there ?]

So right now I'm in Granada (after Valencia, Cordoba and Malaga). It's a very beautiful place and I see myself wanting to stay more so I booked for another week.

I feel safe and happy here [edit: even if really hot in August]. While I'm experiencing the tapas and the Spanish siestas I am also doing my best to clarify where to put my business (Ireland or Estonia knowing that the latter has created a beautiful system with their e-residency to simplify the process without it being sketchy, but resilient and as simple as possible...). [Edit: I am gonna go for the Autonomo Spanish route & when I can, go for the E-residency]

The thing that takes a lot of my mental load is to know where and how to pay in a simple manner my personal taxes...

The other thing that took so much of my energy was to find out where to put my base, where I can be happy to live. Spain is beautiful but it seems a chaotic mess concerning administration matters. I will explore that while I am here. [Edit: Actually it's not that bad, one "just" need to pay a fixed amount for social security which is quite an amount the second year but truly give free medical care...
I have decided to stay (here in Granada) for another 3 months [Edit: 5 months later... I'm still here ?]. I got myself a room for a very good price with a very nice landlord and flatmates. My goal is to prepare myself for the work I'm about to do, on my biz and myself. [And boy, am I preparing that alright! I have never been as clear as I am now!]

I haven't been in Portugal yet and I think this will be my next destination to explore after Spain. [Edit: not right now]

Concerning what I am building now, I have delayed the establishment of the community with the platform Mighty Networks to save the monthly expense and look for another (ethical) solution to begin the conversation going and see if that brings interest... or not. [Edit: I have opened a new account on Mastodon to show what I do and have people exchanging... I need to nourish that but that's where I'll begin for now]

But the many conversations I have during this trip is comforting me that I'm on the right track. Both personally and professionally. [Edit: 5 months in: it's confirmed... I did good]

This trip is teaching me so much about letting go of my own expectations (about the world and about myself) and welcoming Life in all its aspects.

I am meeting very young people and even though I tend to put forward my "older" age in a joking form, I feel very close to them. And they make me feel great and open.
I have had the best and beautiful conversation those past weeks.

I feel I also have to put to rest my regrets on what I did those past 20 years (after I came back from Australia). Part of me have a hard time finding evidence that I actually did anything meaningful beside meeting a beautiful man - now my ex so yes that feels sometimes a failure - who taught me about love and respect as well as standing up for myself.

Professionally, I certainly feel that I lost so much time and wasted so much energy not daring getting out and sharing my intuition and skills, trying to fit in the society that I never related with, not having the confidence to let go when I needed to and live in my own terms. Holding on tight to my comfort zone or - as my friend says it - my familiar zone.

The only thing I can do right now is to let go of the regrets, relinquish perfection and embrace who I am fully, with all my quirks and all (my broken teeth, my scars, my wrinkles, my very imperfect face and body, my closing my eyes when I speak, the way I speak,... yep, all of it).

And put the best of me in action, share my vision and help those that want my help, develop my self-reliance and dare... big [Edit: or actually, just dare do stuff... it doesn't have to be huge: the small steps are as important as the big ones].

There you go. I wanted to share with you where I am at. And also ask you if you'd like to know what is going on with me. If you do, I would write once a month (I just can't do more) [Edit: Well this can vary a lot, so it will be when I can and feel inspired and/or if I'm doing a case study of a visual coaching facilitation & recording... confusing huh... I still haven't found a way to name what I do... yet... hopefully, there's gonna be an edit to that edit ?] and tell you my adventures.

In the meantime, own your own space and take care of yourselves. [Now the catchphrase is "Shine your vibe"... do you like it better?]

Lots of love.

Coralie Renée.